Thursday, June 24, 2010

Jumping into the blogosphere

Here I go diving in, finally to touch cyberspace. It is a bit frightening and exciting all at the same time. So as I explore the world of writing and books and share my thoughts here I will share my thoughts of how my writing is going, and what I am reading.

But first a few thoughts about me. I have always loved writing. I remember being thrilled beyond belief when my mom gave me a "writer's notebook" when I was in the fourth grade. I was so excited by it, I couldn't wait to get writing, creating my next master piece. The new sharpened pencils that came with the pad of paper called to me. My fingers itched to grab one, to take that graphite and change it into beautiful words. Words of a story, a creation of another land, another universe. To create stories so wonderful that my teachers gave me rave reviews, which they always did.

I lived for when I could get home, sharpen my pencil and dive into the world I was creating. I looked forward to every creative writing prompt I got in school, to explore new ways of looking at things and listen to the voices clamoring to be heard inside my head. No, not multiple personalities, but rather characters who wanted to be immortalized by my sharpened pencil.

Soon, however, mandatory high school and college papers took over and squashed those voices until they were completely silent. They tried valiantly to break back out, and here and there I would free them for a just a moment, with a pounding heart, then imprison them almost as quickly afraid of what others might think of what I had created.

I yearned for that little girl I was who had no inhibitions, who freely wrote, but I kept her hushed up, gagged and put her in the farthest corners of my mind.

But she would still tantalize me with the musings of characters who still wanted to play on the page with that sharpened pencil. Instead I ignored her and the characters, feeling that I was too busy with my family, too busy with other things I deemed more important as a grown up. I didn't have time for playing, listening to the beggings of worlds to be unleashed on the blank pages. I settled for writing in my journal. That would have to be enough. But it I knew deep inside that it wasn't enough.

I delved into the worlds of other writers pushing those sober thoughts away, but that little girl would tease me, taunt me with the idea that I could be as good a writer as those I was reading. I could create the same kinds of worlds, the same kinds of characters as they could and I could unleash my imagination once again. But I didn't dare.

I found another who like me yearned to put her story down and was brave enough to submit to a publisher, I felt desire to write again surge inside me and I found that I could wanted to write a book also, one of the many stories dying to be let out of the shadows of my mind.

I swallowed the fear I felt inside me, I swallowed the insecurities and the devilish voice that tried to tell me I was insane, but I shoved that devil right into the corner and bound him up tight and released that little girl who loved to write. And suddenly, I felt an immense sense of freedom. I was finally, free once again to be that little girl who loved to write stories of different places and different worlds where vampires, wizards, sorcerers, werewolves, faeries, and dragons and all kinds of creatures are free to romp and play.

So I hope you join me in my sense of excitement, wonder and magic as I finish up my first novel, and find what I think of other stories I have read fascinating and fresh. As I unleash that little girl here in cyberspace as she helps me find my voice on the printed page permanently. With that being said, WELCOME to Debbie's Inkspectations. Enjoy, and have fun with me as I continue to explore all over again, that childlike sense of imagination that has been waiting to be released.