Sometimes when I am frustrated or just need to figure things out, I find it helps to write. Writing anything at all, it doesn't seem to matter what it is as long as it is something. It has a cathartic ability to release stress, help manage anger, hurt or pain. It can even bring about a sense of accomplishment, joy, or a sense of euphoria . . . especially if you get published. Maybe being published isn't necessary to feel that happiness, but it doesn't hurt either. And it fills a deep seated need to create. I find that when I am working through something important in my life that writing it out helps a lot. And what I am finding now, is that I can get a lot accomplished if I just write. I feel more settled and ready to hit things head on, well maybe not head on, but at least I take a step forward.
I write about my family, my kids and events around me and most of it is in a private journal not meant for other's eyes. I would feel to vulnerable writing my deepest thoughts for all to see, and judge me. I would feel too exposed and raw. Those things I write out long hand in a spiral notebook, that I share with my husband, sometimes my children, and once in a while a few close friends.
I write adventures, and stories and fantasies that bring a happily ever after -- most of the time. Sometimes I write the gruesome and scary, to see what dark road it winds down.
If I don't write, don't get my feelings out some how, I get restless. Sometimes it is hard to identify what is causing it, but when I finally get that pen in my hand, or the computer in my lap to write, I settle down. Then I write and write until the words no longer speak to me, no longer call me to head what they want me to say. Until emptiness is all that remains and I am purged and then I feel so much better. Emotions spent and words played out how they may.
Then there are the times when I write and all my dreams and yearnings pour out on the page. I can be free then, say what I wouldn't in real life. To have courage and conviction. To wish and hope and soar to the skies and back as I make wishes come true with a swish of a fairy wand or a bit of magic. Things that real life doesn't always grant, I can with my pen. It is exciting, fun, and wonderful to escape within the words of my own making.
I am forever grateful to have found my voice, to have freed it. To use it how I will to push me forward in my dreams for the future.
I will write always, for the rest of my life and in that writing I can release who I really am. And at times, I share that part of me no one else knows about when I write with others. When I create I live in freedom. I write life, because to write for me is to live.
So I turn it to you now and wonder, what do you write and why? Have you ever thought about it? Maybe you should and then you can discover what writing really means to you.
