Sorry no cutesy pictures or amazing images. I think solemn is better for now. Today I woke up to find that there was a huge shooting at the theater we frequent often, my kids more than me. It was crazy and so hard to understand how one man could create so much chaos and pain and then smile a calculating cold grin for his mug shot.
It affected me quite a bit. I found out that one of the girls who is a close friend to my kids was hit in the next theater when stray bullets punctured the wall and sprayed shrapnel into her face, along with two other people. She had to go to the hospital and is luckily now resting at home. She is in my Sunday School class and she is one of the Young Women who I used to work with and she is the epitome of smiling through trials. One of her best friends and her sister were with her. I also teach her best friend and these girls are close with my older kids. I am so glad they are alive and will make it though with stronger faith.
My son found that one of his friends was shot in the leg, and another son discovered that 2 of his close friends from school were in the theater with the gun man and by some miracle escaped any kind of injury. But my son fears that one of his friends may not have been as lucky. And is trying to find out if he is among the dead.
There is a ripple effect to the things we do. We may think that it all ends in that moment and place but it doesn't. It goes beyond layer upon layer deeper and deeper as it reaches people beyond the scope of our imaginations throughout the world.
My daughters in Utah in college are trying to find out if any of their friends from high school were in the shooting and have been frantically calling and texting to be sure they are ok.
My boys coaches for football texted, wanting to know if they were safe. Family and friends from back east and across the country called and texted and facebooked to be sure we were ok.
We tell everyone we are fine. We say everyone is ok. But really, we are anguished and until the full disclosure of victims is given we will not be able to close this chapter down and still the nightmares will come. They will persist and sneak in when we least expect it and we will remember the fear and the turmoil that lasted far beyond a one minute senseless shooting spree.
I am grateful beyond words that my boys didn't go to that midnight showing that they were planning on a later time. I am grateful the girls in my class are ok and alive.
I am grateful for a nation who puts their flags at half mast and for police officers who don't care that their cars get bloody as they rush victims to the hospital because ambulances aren't there yet. I am grateful for Paris for pulling their showing of Batman in respect and solidarity to those of us here in Aurora Colorado. I am grateful for the way our world family pulls together at times like this to help each other through grief and devastation.
I cannot understand a mad man's rational. how could he ever think it was ok? But that being said, I am glad he is in custody where he can't hurt anyone anymore. I am glad for those men and women who are working around the clock to help those who were hurt and to try and puzzle through a mind demented and crazy enough to booby trap his own apartment in hopes of creating even more chaos.
My prayers for those hurt and for the families who lost members and for those who are traumatized just by being present go out to them and so does my love and sorrow. And hope that sometime soon we can find our way back to whole and move beyond a crazy maniacal insane man's actions.